After my brother popped the question, and Darlene said “Yes!” Dave figured his part of the wedding planning was mostly over. He had chosen the girl, the ring, and the time to propose; it was up to her to take care of wedding details. “Tell me where and when to be there,” he liked to say.
However, like many couples today, Dave and Darlene were paying for most of the wedding themselves, and Dave’s natural frugality simply wouldn’t allow him to give Darlene carte blanche. He almost choked when she revealed her plans for a Hawaii wedding on the beach. At that point, he decided to wade right in and participate in the planning, mostly to rein in costs. (Romantic fool!)
The first thing he discovered was that destination weddings don’t necessarily cost more than a formal sit-down dinner at a nearby banquet hall. Generally, fewer people are invited when you’re asking them to travel a distance. (And Dave really didn’t mind that his bride’s snooty second cousin wouldn’t be on the guest list). Also, most of the Hawaii wedding packages they considered included the honeymoon. My brother was definitely not displeased that that could start almost immediately after the reception! They planned their wedding for the fall, when costs in Hawaii are generally lower. (Around Christmas to New Year’s is the most expensive time to travel and stay there).
Next, Dave discovered that the beach location of their Hawaii wedding lent itself to a more casual (in his mind, cheaper) air. He and his groomsmen wore khakis and Tommy Bahama shirts, while Darlene’s dress was a beautiful, simple sheath. They used leis for flowers, which looked naturally beautiful and fit right in with the atmosphere of their wedding.
Finally, my brother utilized his pragmatic approach to make the phone calls and barter for the best deals possible for their wedding details. What he found was that many Hawaii wedding packages include most of the costs, and that they could be easily adapted to personal taste. What Dave also found was that he developed a lot more anticipation for the wedding than he expected.
Even though Dave’s involvement began through the most unromantic and pragmatic impulses, his and Darlene’s combined planning efforts resulted in a wedding that reflected both bride and groom in an unforgettably lovely manner.
