Being able to persuade somebody is a powerful skill that very few people take the time to develop. Because you are reading this article, you will soon know the powerful steps to take to make people your obedient servants. Ok, not quite, but you will have some persuasive skills that not many people have.
The first step is to generate something called "rapport." This is that feeling of deep connection you feel sometimes when you feel really close to somebody. An old friend, a teacher, an Internet article writer. Some expert salespeople can create this feeling rather quickly.
This is much easier to do than most people think. All you do is match the other person's body language, speech, speaking rate and tonality, and how they are sitting or standing. This is great on a job interview or a date if you are trying to make a good impression.
Next, you need to find out what is important to them. This is sometimes called their "criteria." It is the underlying reasons they do everything. You can do this by ask them what they like, or other similar things, and ask what they like about them. Keep asking open ended questions until you get some vague words like "peace," or "freedom," or "relaxation," or "reading a great article on the Internet."
The third step is to show them how doing what you want them to do, (your outcome) they will achieve their criteria. Again, this is much easier than it sounds. For example, if it's a date, and the word you get is "happiness," you can explain how your niece or nephew feels really happy when they are with you.
It's best to get three or four words, and slowly use them throughout the conversation. And try to think of three or four different ways to describe your outcome, so they don't think you're being obnoxious. Just slowly start linking up their different criteria words to your outcome described in different ways.
One way to do this is to tell a story.Somebody you know of that is very similar the person you are with, who experienced the same thing they want to by doing what you'd like them to do. If you can describe your outcome three or four different ways, tell three or four different stories. They'll think you are a great story teller, and will magically want to do whatever it is you set out to persuade them to do.
So here you have the simple three steps to persuasion and influence. Of course, like any other skill, this takes practice. And the more you practice, the better you'll get. Once you get to a certain level, you'll be amazed how well this stuff works.
