It’s time we women said, “Enough guilt!” What exactly are
we trying to measure up to anyway?
This may come as news to you, but you will never get fully
caught up on everything. There will always be something more
to get done or something more you could do. Just look at
your kitchen and tell me you don’t know this already!
When is what you’ve done “enough”? How can you get past the
guilt that raises its ugly head? The answer lies in
discovering what you’re trying to prove.
* Proving Your Worth *
For many women, we are trying to prove our worth as a woman.
We’re trying to prove our worth to men, to employers, to our
children and even to other women who are caught in the same
vicious cycle.
It shouldn’t come as a surprise since we live in a world
known for oppressing women. In some ways, we have been
programmed to see our value based on our productivity. The
good thing is that this lie is beginning to have some
critical cracks, ensuring its destruction.
The sad thing is that we women haven’t quite believed the
truth about ourselves. When our self esteem is feeling a
little low, what do we do? We tend to try to prove our value
by what we do instead. Sound familiar?
The problem comes when we discover women are humans, like
everyone else. Humans simply aren’t perfect and we
definitely have limitations. What happens when we simply
can’t do all the jobs presented to us? What happens when
we’re spread too thin to do a great job in every area? You
guessed it…GUILT!
The other problem is the source of where we’re looking for
approval.
When we look outside of ourselves for our sense of value, we
give others permission to decide our worth for us. That’s a
scary place to put ourselves in!
* You Decide Your Value *
What if the person to whom you have to prove your worth is
actually you? You see your girlfriends as valuable so why
would your value be any different? When you choose to
believe you are good enough as you already are, guilt will
begin to lose its strangling grip.
You are a being of choice. As such, you are the one who
chooses your value. What price tag would you like to put on
yourself? As you go higher in value, the effect of guilt
lessens.
* Change Your Thinking *
You are a good enough, but you have to choose to believe it.
You are not a failure and you have incredible value. You
really have nothing to measure up to when you’ve recognized
your own unique worth.
How you feel is up to you. You choose what your thoughts are
and your thoughts affect your feelings. Guilt is simply just
another feeling. Therefore, it stands to reason that to lose
the guilt, you must change your thinking.
Guilt will drain you. On the flip side, positive thoughts
may energize you. Start by saying “NO!” to negative
thoughts. Replace them with positive ones. You’re smart,
you’ll figure out which positive ones have the greatest
effect on you.
* Begin with Decision *
Every action begins with decision. Decide what you need to
do to get inspired about your value. Do you need to remind
yourself you are beautiful and smart? Does doing something
else tell you you’re valuable? Then do it! Set the intention
to accept the truth: you have incredible worth and you have
nothing to prove.
Choose not to let your productivity determine your value and
toss that guilt off the side of a cliff!
Copyright 2007 Tami M. Szabo
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