Our excitement over the Perseid meteor shower got all of us here at PodLake thinking about our favorite Armageddon movies (oddly, Armageddon didn’t make the list). It has also left us wondering: What does the future hold for this old and proud genre? What earth-ending disasters have yet to be dramatized?
We decided to put our heads together to create our top five apocalyptic scenarios as potential Hollywood scripts. So, enjoy. And don’t worry, death by meteor shower didn’t make the list.
5: Anti-Matter
Movie Title: The Heart of the Anti-Matter (we know, this one’s a stretch)
Plot Summary: A corrupt scientist, in a misguided plot to sell WMD to a rogue state, smuggles antimatter from the supercollider. The antimatter quickly consumes him and becomes a semi-anthropomorphic supervillian which threatens to plunge the world into darkness.
Cast: Anyone know what the G’mork is up to these days? (Good catch if you got that one)
4: Black Hole
Movie Title: Hell Hole
Plot Summary: Bumbling scientists inadvertently create a tiny black hole which threatens to make its way to the center of the earth and consume the planet. Our only hope lies with the savant-like scientific genius of a lovable, eleven-year-old girl to figure out how to reverse the hole’s gravitational density.
Cast: We’re thinking Abigail Breslin.
3: Burned Out Sun
Movie Title: Sunshine
Plot Summary: The Sun is being destroyed from inside out by a type of highly stable form of matter that renders nuclear fusion impossible…wait, that’s ridiculous. No one in Hollywood would green light such an absurd script.
Cast: Abigail Breslin? No? Come on guys, how does Little Miss Sunshine not make it into this move??
Disclaimer: Director Danny Boyle (Trainspotting) and writer Alex Garland (28 Days Later) clearly stole this idea from us before we had written or conceived of it.
2: World of Warcraft
Movie Title: Attack of the Horde
Movie Plot: The Horde finally overtakes Azeroth sparking an era of darkness and terror. Well, the actual world is not destroyed but we can no longer tell the difference.
Cast: Leeroy Jenkins as himself.
1: God
Movie Title: Enough is Enough
Movie Plot: God finally watches an episode of The Simple Life, and decides to call it quits. Wrath and fury ensue. Not even Bruce Willis can save us from this one.
Cast: Well duh, Britney Spears as Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan as Nicole Ritchie. Oh, and Bruce Willis of course.
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-Brian
