People today have become more selfish and individualistic in nature. Social psychologists insist that this change in the personality of human beings is not drastic and sudden. People's personalities have simply undergone a shift. Before the 1970s, people were more prone to pluralistic concepts of sacrifice and tolerance. Individuals were willing to give up personal goals and desires for the pursuit of familial ones. In fact, people were encouraged and socially trained to be pluralistic in nature. This perspective was reflected in the prominence and dominance of marriages. Social psychologists argue that people were eager to get married as they had been conditioned to sacrifice at the altar of family. They were discouraged to be ego-centric and individualistic in nature.
But, today the equation has changed. People, especially women, have become focused on themselves i.e. individualistic in nature. People have become selfish and will no longer sacrifice personal pleasures and pursuits. This attitude change has not come overnight. It has occurred due to liberation movements of women empowerment -- legislative reforms of Matrimonial Acts which expanded the scope for divorce uplifting women to an equal status with man. Today, women refuse to adjust their selfish goals and freedom for anyone, including family. They have emerged extremely focused, dynamic and determined. Women don’t want to be subjugated anymore and are demanding recognition of their individualism. It is for this reason that women today prefer not to get married.
Marriage, according to them, will limit their individual expression forcing them into an existence of mindless sacrifice and adjustment. Women do not want to sacrifice their goals and freedom at any price. They are aware that men in a marriage do not treat them as equal partners. Men expect them to make the adjustment and needed sacrifices. When this traditional gender role is questioned, men divorce their wives. Thus, both men and women opt not to get married and face disillusionment. Social psychologists state that the human personality is regressing. People are reverting back to childhood behaviour of ego-centrism i.e. behaviour ruled by Id. They further clarify this with an example.
They state that in olden days, one would have expected the child to throw a temper tantrum and behave as he/ she wished. In a party, everyone is waiting for the Guest of Honour. One child feels very hungry. He cannot resist the temptation to eat the delicious chicken placed before him. He quickly eats it satisfying his selfish desire to eat. This act of fulfilling one's personal desires while ignoring the needs of others shows the dominance and prevalence of Id in children. Everyone at the party was hungry. But only the child acted. What does this show? This shows that children display individualism, immediate goal fulfillment irrespective of the feelings of other people.
This childlike behaviour is being seen in adults today. The personality constituent of Id has come to the fore. The wife who works long hours not caring about her husband's feelings, long distance marriages including long-term affairs and cohabitation are several ways to maintain the dominance of Id. People are not sacrificing their individual freedom and at the same fulfilling their sexual desires. This signifies individualism and immediate goal fulfillment. This willing step not to enter into marriage shows us that today, people are not hypocrites. They do not want the responsibility to run and maintain a family. They prefer to be responsible for themselves. They are more willing to spend their income on individual investments and luxuries.
They do not want the headache of adjustment, sacrifice and reconciliation anymore. They are no longer willing to change and mould themselves differently for the sake of someone else. Here, one has to talk about the role of education and social change. Education has succeeded in widening perceptions and encouraging the growth of new ideas. Women today are venturing into new professionals of astronomy and nuclear physics. People including men are working harder to compete with women to maintain their gender supremacy. Women are breaking the glass ceiling and becoming leaders. This has resulted in a single focus by people, to be the best and maintain their supremacy. People are therefore always competing -- with each other, with society and with time. This fast-paced scenario suggests that people don't have time for each other anymore. They do not want their focus to be divided anymore.
