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Fighting Fair

Date Published: 20th April 2006
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Author: Smita Aggarwal RSS Views: N/A PRINT ASK ABOUT THIS ARTICLE
Disagreement, confrontation, arguments or a hot fight, no matter what it is, but the next time you have a screaming match, make sure it brings you both closer. For that you need a fair fight.

Conflict is a normal, inevitable and even to some extent a healthy aspect of most relationships. When managed well & healthily it can enhance and strengthen relationships.

Withdrawal from an argument does not solve the problem rather damages relationship. Always remember the purpose of a fight is to reconcile the differences and dissolve the distances.

During a fight, frustrations are high, voices are loud and vision is clouded; these all can lead a relation to reach a point of no return. So, understand the disaster and find a constructive and mutually satisfying way to resolve the problem.


When the going is tough, always count on the fact that you both truly love and care for each other. Learn to replace hurtful or abusive words. Try and use words that show your difference in opinion but also convey your love and care. Never say anything you don't mean because bitter words linger on for much longer than the issue.

Be assertive while arguing as being passive or aggressive will cause trouble in finding a status quo.

Be specific: Try addressing the problem instead of targeting the person's sentiments. Handle the issue in hand and don't bring up other past issues. It's always win-win or lose-lose situation, there is nothing like win-lose game in relationship.

Finally and most importantly never go to bed angry. Try and finish the fight as unresolved anger can destroy intimacy. Always either kiss and makeup or close on a good note.


In a nutshell, fair fighting can get us from difference to a greater level of intimacy.


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