It can happen slowly. It can be a sudden loss. Whichever way it comes, erectile dysfunction (ED) can be devastating for men and their partners. What was previously a happy relationship is now stressful. There is fear and guilt, bitterness and resentment. All this emotion can be unspoken which makes it all the more corrosive, burning from within until all the heart of the partnership is ash and only the shell of appearances remains for the outside world to see.

In the old days, couples might stay together out of habit or because they were afraid of what the world might think if they separated. Now, it’s too easy for one to pack a bag and leave. There’s a new spirit of instant reaction in the world ... the, "I don’t see why I should put up with this!" approach to life (or should that be retreat from life?)

So what are the options?
Let’s start off with the assumption that you have a good medical history with no previous sexual difficulty. If you are no longer able to get an erection, your immediate priorities should be to talk to your partner and then your doctor. If you can’t save your relationship, getting a cure leaves you lonely but, perhaps, wiser.

Your Relationship
Your relationship is worth saving, isn’t it? You love her, don’t you? Well, talking about your problems tells her you still care and makes her a part of the solution. Once she’s involved, she’s far more likely to help you through it. If you keep on shutting her out, why should she care what happens to you?

Once you’re talking to your partner, there’s no longer an excuse to put off talking to your doctor. You need answers about the underlying cause for the ED. But, no matter how quickly or slowly the diagnostic investigation takes, there’s one simple truth. Oral medications now represent the first-line therapy. So fairly soon, you’re going to find yourself discussing which of the three main drugs are for you and your partner.

The first on the market was Viagra (sold as Sildenafil) with Cialis and Levitra following in 2003. Over the next few weeks, we’re going to be looking at each of these drugs in more detail and offering general advice on how you can start to rebuild your relationship just as soon as sexual activity returns.

Treatment for erectile dysfunction
But, of course, I may have been a little optimistic. Some of the time you’re going to need other medical treatment before or as well as using Viagra, Cialis or Levitra. And there will be a few times when you’re not allowed to take the pills at all or the pills only prove a partial success. If that happens, medical science also provides penile injection therapy and vacuum constrictive devices. The option of a penile prosthesis also provides a highly reliable long-term solution with couples reporting a high satisfaction rate. In more rare cases, surgery may be required.

So far, I’ve been assuming that the underlying cause is physical, but the mind can be just as important a factor as the body’s physical processes. It’s possible that psychotherapy may be indicated. There’s no need to feel any shame about this. Twenty years ago, men wouldn’t talk about ED at all. There was too much embarrassment involved.

The appearance of Viagra on the market changed the culture.

The knowledge that there was a cure encouraged men to be more confident about reporting the problem. Now doctors and therapists can help you and your partner to rebuild your sexual lives together. They are professionals. They provide a non-judgmental service designed to manage and relieve the problem of ED. Again, this may be supported by the use of Viagra, Cialis or Levitra. But, you should discuss the use of any drugs with them before you buy.

One factor to consider, however, is that if the medical advice is to start taking Viagra, Cialis or Levitra, you may find it cheaper to buy online. Sometimes, the retail prices are higher in your home states. When you buy Viagra or one of the others online, you may well find a heavily discounted price. It’s the same drug. It just costs less.