The death of a marriage or a relationship is something to be mourned. The pain is not made better by the fact that the future of children often have to be decided in the midst of it. Finding the best possible child custody agreements should therefore be an absolute priority with both parties.

The law stipulates that child custody agreements should be drawn up with the best interests of the child(ren) in mind. This sounds very noble and everyone would agree that this should be the basic point of departure. The problem is, however, that parents very often have diametrically opposed views of the different scenarios that will serve the best interests of their children. If you are at present engaged in thinking through the options for custody arrangements you should ensure that you have a strategy in place for achieving the goal of serving the best possible interests of your children. Here are a few very basic things that you should do:

* Study some of the basic concepts underpinning child custody agreements: The legal background to custody cases can very often be totally bewildering for parents. You should of course get legal help, you cannot however leave everything in the hands of your attorney. Knowing some basic things, like the different types of custody arrangements, the standards that the court will use to decide custody, how to those standards will be applied etc., can greatly assist in the midst of the process. It will not only enable you to make intelligent decisions throughout the process, it will also clearly show up the areas where you should focus your attention.

* Get the best possible legal representation: If you do decide to contest the child custody arrangements in court you should make sure that you get the best possible attorney on side. Family Law is a complex and specialised area. Try to avoid therefore to get 'uncle Bob from down the street', and hire a recognised expert.

* Do your best to remain calm, prepared and organised:You should tackle the process of obtaining the best possible child custody agreements as a major project with definable steps and outcomes. Approaching it in a professional way will keep you from viewing the whole process as an all-out war. 'Bare Knuckle Fighting' may perhaps be satisfying on some level, it is however not nearly the best way to approach one of the most important tasks that you will ever undertake.

The above is obviously the merest outline of some of the things that will be necessary in order to achieve the best possible child custody agreements. Bottom line: Do your best to understand the process, get the best possible people on side and approach the process in a professional way.

It is my hope that it would be true that your kids best interests were served by the way in which you approached this phase of your life!


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