Of late, I have been acutely aware of how some folks are dealing with their stress through the various coping mechanisms or habits that they turn to when they feel threatened.
The major types of stressors that many are experiencing are their basic primal needs being threatened; food, shelter, and clothing, and for others their internal demons, or shadows have become more exaggerated. As fear begins to permeate every part of an individual’s reality and the world around them, some shut down and become isolated and others use distraction as a way to turn away from their inner pain and suffering, thus making habits more intense and noticeable.
I’ve been working from home lately and have been aware of the ever-changing weather I have noticed this spring. My office has windows that face the east and the south, so I get a wide view of the outdoors. One minute it is sunny, the next rainy, the next windy. Within 15 minutes the weather could change dramatically. It’s a beautiful illustration of impermance and detachment.
It makes me think of how our thoughts are like that. One minute we’re thinking of one thing, the next minute our thoughts draw us somewhere else. Like clouds in the sky, they shimmer and shine as they go by. If one can consciously notice this, then perhaps they could begin to discipline the mind to slow down which would help ease anxiety that often leads to unhealthy habits. If we could slow ourselves down enough to notice, then we can become witness to our habits and behaviors. If we can say either out loud or to ourselves, “Just thinking, just thinking” then it takes away the “juice” of the thought. A metaphor that I think of is riding a train and looking out the window and seeing snapshots of the view. Our thoughts are like snapshots. It’s when we get attached to them, that cause us to go off on a mental tangent. If we’re not aware, we can create a worse case scenario that could unconsciously activate our habit. It is when we realize that we are not present, that we are most present.
This is an excellent time to become curious with how your various coping strategies serve you, and whether or not they provide the relief that they may have in the past.
If we can come from the place of compassion for our selves and our various habits that we have taken on, then we can begin to release the ones that no longer serve us. When a habit is first established, the intention is to bring relief, which is a positive intention. In over use, the habit can cause harm and become a burden. For example, someone may learn that having a few drinks will relax them. It’s easier for them to express themselves and cope with life. If a person continues to use alcohol in this way, it can become a crutch that prevents them from coping in a healthy way. In fact, the drinking can cause more anxiety and isolation. Thus creating a vicious cycle. At this point, it is important to really look closely at the habit and weigh out the consequences of continuing it. You don’t break a habit; you replace it with something that will better serve you.
Here are some suggestions to begin this process of self-observation.
* Stay in the moment and take small practical steps to begin recognizing a pattern of behavior or habit that may no longer be serving you. Refrain from doing it, relax into it, and resolve it by acknowledging how it has served you in the past and how it may no longer serve you now.
* This is a time to be completely honest with yourself and to take responsibility for how your coping behavior may be outdated. Be gentle with yourself and recognize the positive intention of the coping behavior and release it gently with love.
Catherine VanWetter is a holistic practitioner trained in a variety of healing techniques that helps people come to a place of peace within themselves. Her newest book and meditation CD, "The Soul of the Heart", offers inspiration, deep healing and hope during these turbulent times. Download Catherine's Morning Meditation Free at www.ToTheHeartOfTheMatter.com.
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