We do not require the services of a psychologist to let us know that the best relationships are those that are based on good communication. Yet, we hardly ever try to change our ways. We continue on along our paths, eager that somehow everything will fall into place. Sometimes, it does – thanks to the hard work of our partners. But typically it does not. We allow the fault lines to grow deeper and arrive at a stage where they can no longer be bridged.
The first necessity to have good communication in a relationship is to respect each other. Men, who consider their wives inferior will seldom, if ever, strike a good relationship. The same is true for women. They can never hope to gain their confidence and affection if they look down upon their husbands.
Good communication also requires good listening skills. A husband and a wife must discover how to listen to each other. They must focus on to what their spouse is saying, and respond. Very often, couples grow apart because the husband and wife don’t pay attention to what each other are saying. This can be very frustrating – for one or for both.
There should also be sympathy. A spouse must show concern when things are not going right. This is the unspoken communication. One does not have to convey it. Mere body language becomes a foundation for comfort. You feel stronger if your partner holds your hand and tells you that you can defeat your misfortunes. Suddenly, you don’t feel alone. The relationship grows.
Another way to build a relationship is to talk about uncomfortable issues. It is difficult to tell your spouse as to how your boss has neglected you or how you have made a fool of yourself in front of your co-workers. It requires great courage to face your faults. But if you have a loving spouse, and if you believe that they will support you, then you must discuss subjects that damage male egos or female vanities. You will find that you have gotten rid of a big psychological burden. More than that, the emotional bonds between you and your spouse will grow to be stronger.
The same applies to sexual relationships. Couples perform better when they respect each other, and communicate better with each other. The communication isn’t always through words alone. Simple acts of caressing or holding hands are a big form of communication. They break up resentments over perceived or actual slights, bridge distances and create positive energy.
Matthew Ohms is the writer for
www.RelationshipGuide.net. Please visit the site for more advice on relationships.
