So you're in the market to buy your significant someone a gift, but your debit card is a wee bit strained in these hard economic times. Macaroni art may have worked for Mom when you were five, but your sweetheart definitely deserves something decadent, intimate, memorable -- also something that won't leave your house in foreclosure. Hmm. How about a gift that will turn up the heat on intimacy, turn down the not-so-pleasant noise of life and delight you both in the process?
It cannot be stressed strongly enough that as a couples' gift, lingerie just rocks! Think about it. You give your partner your friendship, your thoughts, your body, the very minutes of your life. These are amazing gifts! But have you ever thought to put a bow on them? Have you ever considered wrapping them up in the prettiest paper you could find and really letting your other half know how significant their daily gifts are to you? Have you ever wanted to show your lover just how beautiful and exciting they are through your eyes?
Although it is certainly possible to break the bank with designer lingerie, decorating yourself or your darlin' need not cost you so dearly. However, before you can go shopping you'll have to get over a few hang-ups.
The Body Beautiful
The single biggest obstacle to the success of a lingerie gift is inhibition. And by that I mean
FEAR.
For some it's body consciousness. (
I don't think I need to point and laugh at genders here.) If this is your major issue with lingerie, friend, get over yourself! No one is perfect, and I mean no one! It's a fairly good guess that your partner is with you because they (
gasp) actually dig you. This doesn't mean that they're into some abstract, ethereal you that you call a "personality". This means the whole you, body included. Maybe this means your body especially and you are too wrapped up in self loathing to even notice. You know those cosmetic mirrors that magnify on one side and are a regular standard mirror on the other? If you suffer from fearful body consciousness, it's like only ever using the magnifying mirror. Your partner doesn't see you that way. You need to trust them. If your sweetie doesn't dream about your bodacious bod, then as a couple, you might just have bigger problems to tackle than solving for the perfect gift.
Don't forget, too, that the universe of lingerie is wonderfully varied! Shop around, mull it over and keep looking until you find something that you can really see yourself in. And don't stop there! Think about how you will introduce your dangerous dainties to your partner. Where will you be? How will you act? What will you do or say? How will you create the perfect scene for intimate fun? Yes, "fun". This isn't about how you hate your belly. This is about creating memories, intimacy, and showing your love and appreciation. In short, it's about having a blast! So, think about ways to tantalize your lover with your body and clothes, or lack thereof. Think about it long and hard and by all means don't overlook the inhibition melting power of candlelight, incense or perfume, and a good glass of wine. That having been said let's move on to the next fearful obstacle…
Express Your Desire
For the love of all that's beautiful on this watery rock we call home, if you don't talk to your significant other about what's significant to you then chances are great that over time the significance of your relationship will dwindle away to something well…not so significant.
You don't keep your favorite foods or pet peeves from your partner, so why would you keep your sexual fantasies bottled up? Take the chance and clothe the one you love in something that will make you melt. Show them what you find irresistible. Give them the chance to star in your fantasies. There's no need to make excuses for yourself or beg politely. Begging is not sexy. Insecurity is not sexy.
Consider your gift carefully. Get your sizes right. There's no need for surprises here. Let your partner shop with you. Retail foreplay can be amazing fun! Tandem online browsing for lingerie and other intimates is an inexpensive date, but one of the very best for a fascinating evening at home!
Show your special someone that they are admired and respected but that you deserve to be pleasured and treated royally. To the rest of the world you are a number, a body, just another snowflake in the blizzard. To the one you choose to partner with you should be the most important person in the world. Communicate your needs and desires clearly, insistently and joyfully!
Luxury for Less
A luxurious and sensual evening for two can cost anywhere from absolutely nothing to everything you have and then some. If you have the digits to blow then live it up and enjoy! If you don't, don't despair! No lack of money is going to stand in the way of you enjoying your life! If your bank account has any bearing on your bedroom, please let it be the quality of your blinds and not what happens behind them! One investment that you have complete control over is your relationship. Feed it steadily and the returns will be astronomical!
Any variety of
inexpensive lingerie fantasies can be had for under $30. Add a reasonably priced bottle of wine or champagne for another $12. Too much food is typically a sex-spoiler, but a light and elegant home cooked meal is easily had for less than $20. Eat with your hands, feed each other! Turn on some soothing music. Indulge all of your senses! Savor the food, regarding it as an appetizer to the main course. Throw in a few candles and you still haven't broken $100.
For the creative, there are dozens of ways to trim back even further. For example, use scarves, hose and jewelry you already own to invent your own costume. Save on the alcohol by buying in bulk and planning for future couples' nights. Many boxed wines are adequately tasty and can be had at five liters for under $20.
In summary, creativity and communication in conjunction with next to no dough can set the stage for a birthday, anniversary or any day at all. There the two of you can play out the memories that money alone can't buy - Now get out there and break a leg!
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In addition to her freelance projects, Wynter Stark is a copyright writer for Touch of That
Lingerie. A student of both fashion and life, her approach to both is all about the journey.
