My wife and I have been trying to get pregnant for the past 3 years of our marriage. We actually got pregnant 9 months ago, but my wife miscarried. If there's any consolation, at least we know that we're not infertile. We are now just trying and praying to God. In this process, we've contemplated adoption. As we've considered adopting a child, I've stumbled over 3 primary concerns: money, love, and process. I'll go into these in greater detail. Please keep in mind that these are only my first thoughts on adoption as a possible parent. I haven't yet done enough research.

Financially, we are tight. We are continuing to get ourselves out of the financial hole due to bad spending habits during the start of our marriage. I had been desiring to wait to have children, but my wife reminded me that having a child while tight financially is better than not having a child but having more cash. Children always win over money. (At least they should.) We're desiring to make the sacrifice. Although this attitude is all well and good when bearing your own kids, I'll bet that an adoption agency has tighter financial requirements for those they accept. Not to mention the fees. As of now, I don't think we can afford adoption.

When the subject of adoption first came up between us, I didn't give it serious consideration. My heart has always been set on having my own children from my own seed. I've always thought much of the love I'd experience for my child would be the wonderful thought that he is from me. (You got me, I'm hoping for a son.) As I've considered it further, however, I sincerely believe I could love an adopted child just the same as my own. Love is much more an expression of the heart than a mystical feeling of oneness. Additionally the thought that I "saved" this child would provide magical feelings throughout parenthood. Maybe I'd even think of myself as this child's hero!

The third concern I've dealt with when contemplating adoption is a fear of the long process. I regularly hear horror stories of the time and expense needed to adopt a child. An acquaintance even experienced an ordeal where there surfaced a risk the birth mother could take the child back into custody six or so months after the fact. I'd want to be sure of the outcome before starting the necessary steps. Then I read stories of adoptive parents traveling to foreign countries to pick up a child with the only expense being a plane ticket. Could it be so simple?

The truth is that I haven't researched adoption enough to understand the facts about the above money, love, and process issues. Well, I have figured out that I will love whatever child with whom God blesses us. This article is just the first step in my journey to come to grips with the issues. I have even programmed a website where I hope to solicit articles from others weighing adoption or adoptive parents. You are invited to post an article as well. No one needs to be an expert -- I'm sure not! There isn't even a need to be a great writer. Your knowledge on the topic is what matters.

Matt Garimentis has written and compiled many more adoption articles. Publishers: get a unique version of this article from website content.