http://www.articlealley.com en-us editorial@articlealley.com Is your marriage in trouble? The first question you need to ask yourself is: "Do I want to save this marriage or do I want to leave it?" If the answer is that you want to save it, then this article is for you. Following are 7 rules or choices that y... http://www.articlealley.com/article_661114_35.html 10th October 2008 William grew up with a mother who was depressed much of her life. As the oldest of three children with a father who was not around much, William took on a lot of responsibility for his mother's wellbeing. He grew up as a kind and caring man, believing tha... http://www.articlealley.com/article_659242_35.html 07th October 2008 Many people have the ability to truly care and receive joy when caring from the heart. Yet even very caring people sometimes find themselves using caring as a form of control. Take a moment right now to think about a situation today in which you were ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_648141_24.html 24th September 2008 "We never seem to be able to solve any problems," Kaylee told me in a phone session. "Every time we sit down to solve a problem, we end up fighting. It doesn't really matter what it is about - it always ends up the same. Is this normal? Aren't couples sup... http://www.articlealley.com/article_642436_35.html 18th September 2008 "…no one ever pushes you toward freedom. You need to take that for yourself." --Joan Erickson, wife of psychologist Erik Erickson, quoted in Joan Anderson's book, A Walk on the Beach. Do you believe that someone has to give you your freedom? Do you ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_638620_24.html 15th September 2008 Research into good marriages indicates that the most important choice healthy couples make is to have good will toward each other. This may seems like a simple requirement, yet many couples have anything but good will toward each other. Instead, they make... http://www.articlealley.com/article_630583_35.html 09th September 2008 "I know that my boyfriend loves me, but he has a lot of women friends. I don't get why he has to have so many women friends. I get scared and jealous when he spends time with another woman. I know I should trust him, but I don't, and I don't know what to ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_623360_35.html 06th September 2008 "Sandra wants to end our marriage," Ted told me in our phone session. "She says that I am not meeting her needs." I often hear this in my counseling practice. How did we get the idea that marriage is about the other person meeting our needs, or abou... http://www.articlealley.com/article_616252_35.html 03rd September 2008 Experiencing emotional intimacy with others is one of the most satisfying experiences of life. Emotional intimacy, or a sense of deep connection with another person or a group of people, occurs when each person is completely open hearted and devoted to ta... http://www.articlealley.com/article_608585_35.html 24th August 2008 "All happy people are grateful. Ungrateful people cannot be happy. We tend to think that being unhappy leads people to complain, but it is truer to say that complaining leads to people becoming unhappy." - Dennis Prager Take a moment to think about thi... http://www.articlealley.com/article_603092_24.html 18th August 2008 "This force [that keeps us always wanting] is known in several Buddhist traditions as the Wanting Mind. The Wanting Mind is always craving an experience different from the one it currently has." --Brent Kessel, It's Not About the Money There is nothin... http://www.articlealley.com/article_597243_24.html 13th August 2008 Emotional infidelity occurs when you or your partner become emotionally connected with someone outside your relationship, either in person or on the Internet. How dangerous to a marriage or committed relationship is emotional infidelity? One way of ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_589661_35.html 24th July 2008 Are you one of those people who secretly wish you believed in God? Or are you one of those people who believe in God in an abstract way rather than a personal way? Are you actually doing everything you can to never have an experience of God, while denying... http://www.articlealley.com/article_579340_51.html 17th July 2008 Insomnia is quite common in our society. While there many different reasons for sleep problems - such as poor diet, too much sugar and refined carbohydrates, too much caffeine, or lack of exercise - I want to share two major causes and the solutions to th... http://www.articlealley.com/article_576305_23.html 15th July 2008 Have you ever had an argument with someone - a partner, spouse, close friend, child, parent or other relative, or a business associate - that started small and spiraled into an intense conflict? Have you ever scratched your head, wondering how it got so o... http://www.articlealley.com/article_572905_35.html 09th July 2008 The Encarta World English Dictionary defines "enmesh" as "to entangle somebody or something in something from which it is difficult to be extricated or separated." Are you entangled with your children in a way that is limiting both you and your childre... http://www.articlealley.com/article_566020_40.html 30th June 2008 While it is probable that no one consciously sets out to create a life of substance abuse, those who end up addicted to substances are choosing certain thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that will likely end up leading to some form of substance abuse - drug... http://www.articlealley.com/article_560361_24.html 20th June 2008 Haley, 38, consulted with me because her boyfriend had just broken up with her. Shocked and broken-hearted, she tearfully told me about how wonderful he was and about how she didn't know how she could survive this break up. Haley and Owen had been toge... http://www.articlealley.com/article_555734_24.html 13th June 2008 Are you stuck in your life? Do you receive some satisfaction from staying stuck and from no one being able to help you get unstuck? If you are invested in staying stuck, why not do it consciously and deliberately? Here is your guide to never getting unstu... http://www.articlealley.com/article_546471_24.html 25th May 2008 "The modern tradition of equating death with an ensuing nothingness can be abandoned. For there is no reason to believe that human death severs the quality of the oneness in the universe." - Larry Dossey, MD Kenny, a client of mine, told me that his ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_546463_24.html 23rd May 2008 "Love has nothing to do with fairness. Love is Love." --Susan Page, Why Talking is Not Enough "It's not fair!" How often have you heard this from young or adolescent siblings? I grew up as an only child, so I was never indoctrinated with the co... http://www.articlealley.com/article_542606_35.html 20th May 2008 How long should your child breast-feed? Should your child go to pre-school? Should your child sleep with you or by him or herself? What about home-schooling vs. attending school? Most people who choose to have children want to be good parents, and t... http://www.articlealley.com/article_536791_27.html 14th May 2008 You've worked all your life and now you are looking forward to retirement. How will you spend your time? Many people have not created balance in their lives between work and play, so when it comes to leisure time or retirement, they don't know what to ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_532164_24.html 08th May 2008 "By the right choice and true application of thought, man ascents to the Divine Perfection; by the abuse and wrong application of thought, he descents below the level of the beast. Between these two extremes are all the grades of character, and man is the... http://www.articlealley.com/article_528163_24.html 01st May 2008 As a relationships counselor, I often work with people who are unhappy in their relationship and thinking of leaving. They believe that they are unhappy because of their partner, but the real reason is that they are not taking responsibility for their own... http://www.articlealley.com/article_522262_35.html 25th April 2008 Do love and marriage really go together like a horse and carriage? For some they do but for many they don't. Why not? Why does love seem to die away in so many marriages? At the beginning of most relationships that eventually lead to marriage, the ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_517710_35.html 16th April 2008 Research indicates that, unless there is violence in the home, children are better off being raised by an intact family. Whenever clients who have children call to work with me on their marriage, I always encourage them to do all they can to save their ma... http://www.articlealley.com/article_512521_27.html 07th April 2008 Most parents REALLY want to be good parents. But since it is rare for parents to take parenting classes before becoming parents, we inadvertently do lots of things to mess up our kids. This tongue-in-cheek article may help you to see what you are doing! ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_507885_27.html 03rd April 2008 Are you thinking of getting a divorce because: * Your spouse is physically abusive with you or with your children? * Your spouse is an alcoholic or drug addict and has no intention of dealing with the addiction? * Your spouse has a gambling addiction... http://www.articlealley.com/article_502053_35.html 01st April 2008 One of the most common complaints I receive in my relationship counseling work is "We hardly ever have sex." Since you might be addicted to the anger and complaining around this issue, I want to make sure you do ALL the right things so you get to continue... http://www.articlealley.com/article_497248_35.html 27th March 2008 No one SAYS they want a terrible relationship, yet so many people go about creating them that we need to assume they must WANT them! So, here's my 7 Step foolproof guide to creating a terrible relationship. 1. TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN FEELIN... http://www.articlealley.com/article_490911_35.html 17th March 2008 Most parents want to be good parents. Yet parenting is one of those things that does not have hard and fast rules. So how do we know what to do? How do we know what will support our children in being all they can be? One of the most important things fo... http://www.articlealley.com/article_486586_27.html 07th March 2008 Imagine two big spotlights. One is pointed upward, casting light far into the air. The other is pointed downward and buried into the earth - no light is cast at all. This is like intent. There are only two possible intentions in any given moment: t... http://www.articlealley.com/article_482798_24.html 27th February 2008 Have you ever noticed the difference in people who are able to easily let go of resentment and forgive, and those who stay in anger and blame? What I have noticed is that those who continue to stay in blame and resentment are often people who see thems... http://www.articlealley.com/article_476537_24.html 19th February 2008 When I was in school training to be a psychotherapist, one of my professors introduced me to a concept that I find very valuable: "bad faith." We are in bad faith with ourselves and others when we are out of alignment with what is true for "who we real... http://www.articlealley.com/article_472699_24.html 11th February 2008 In my counseling practice, I often hear people saying things like: "It's my fault that she asked for a divorce. If I hadn't worked so much, she wouldn't have left." "It's my fault that he left. If I had been more sexual, he wouldn't have had an affa... http://www.articlealley.com/article_468237_24.html 05th February 2008 Have you recently ended a relationship or are you recently divorced? Are you thinking about dating again? Many times, putting yourself back into the dating scene is a good idea. But how can you know when it is time to start a new relationship? Here ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_463609_35.html 29th January 2008 Failure! What do you feel when you think about failure? Inadequate? Unworthy? Unlovable? It is so sad that you might have learned to link failure to your value as a person. Most people who are successful in their work and their relationships have exper... http://www.articlealley.com/article_459481_24.html 24th January 2008 Many people on a personal and spiritual growth path have read about the law of attraction. Simply stated, this law says that like attracts like, which means, in a general sense, that happiness draws happiness and misery draws misery. The law states that w... http://www.articlealley.com/article_251569_24.html 18th January 2008 Marilee had grown up with very strict authoritarian parents, and decided that when she had children she would not be controlling with them the way her parents had been with her. Unfortunately, the only thing she knew to do was to be a permissive parent, w... http://www.articlealley.com/article_242063_27.html 07th November 2007 Peggy had been married to James for 14 years when she first consulted with me for help with her relationship and her anxiety. "I can't stand being in this marriage anymore. We have two wonderful children and I don't want to break up this famil... http://www.articlealley.com/article_222623_35.html 04th October 2007 "My parents were distant, unaffectionate people. I don't remember ever being held by them. They were never interested in how I thought or felt. I never felt important to them at all.""My mother was crazy - nice one minute and the next a scream... http://www.articlealley.com/article_218444_24.html 25th September 2007 "I'm so sick and tired of Andrea's anger and bossiness that I'm about ready to leave this relationship," said Paul in our phone counseling session. "Everything has to be her way. Why can't she just keep her mouth shut? She is ruining ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_214872_35.html 20th September 2007 Linda sat opposite me at one of my five-day Inner Bonding Intensives. She had decided to attend the Intensive because her depression, which had plagued her for years, was not being helped by medication or by the numerous forms of therapy that she had trie... http://www.articlealley.com/article_212367_24.html 12th September 2007 We are attracted to each other at our common level of woundedness and our common level of health. What does this mean? For example, Jackson, a very attractive man in his early 50s, had been married three times and had been in many relationships. He ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_208288_35.html 28th August 2007 Jennifer consulted with me regarding her 18-year marriage. "I just don't know what to do. I believe in marriage, and I have tried to believe in my marriage. But Jake's drinking has been getting worse and worse for most of our marriage, and so are his ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_201687_35.html 14th August 2007 The underlying basis of all addictions - and alcohol is no exception - is the avoidance of pain. While there is evidence that some people have genetic and biological predispositions toward alcoholism, not all people with these predispositions abuse alcoho... http://www.articlealley.com/article_198450_17.html 07th August 2007 "My husband and I have a great working relationship. He's great to the kids, he's nice to me, he works hard on the house but he isn't very interested in getting to know me for who I really am. Any exploration around personal growth is threatening to him. ... http://www.articlealley.com/article_195814_35.html 01st August 2007 "Sam whines and complains to me a lot, and then expects me to be turned on to him and make love with him. When I don’t want to, he gets angry," said Jackie in our first telephone counseling session. "I have become more and more shut down. I don't wan... http://www.articlealley.com/article_191659_35.html 25th July 2007 Guilt is the feeling that results when you tell yourself that you have done something wrong. HEALTHY GUILT Healthy guilt is the feeling that occurs when you have actually done something wrong - such as deliberately harming someone. This is an impor... http://www.articlealley.com/article_189653_24.html 24th July 2007