Three Choices You Can Make to Reduce Your Holiday Stress
By: Michele Dortch | Posted: 22nd December 2006
Let’s face it…being a mom is already filled with its own challenges. Then comes the holiday season and somewhere between gift shopping, decorating, cooking and entertaining guests, you may just end up going off the deep end!
This year take time to take these three simple, yet powerful, choices to reduce your holiday stress:
1. Choose to delegate. I know what you’re thinking, “it’s easier if I just do it myself.” And when you’re moving at a frantic pace, often just taking care of things does seem like the logical thing to do. Eventually, doing everything yourself will cause you to burn-out and it would be awful for that moment to happen just when you’re kids are running berserk in your house and your mother-in-law tells you what she’d do if it were up to her.
Start practicing the fine art of delegation today by asking a family member to help you with something you’ve had on your “to-do” list that never seems to get crossed off. To begin, offer the simple, easy-to-explain tasks. Then, be clear about the outcome you want and agree on how you’ll follow up. This approach works well for adults and most children.
For example, you’re planning the big family holiday meal. Instead of taking on the entire affair, ask your family to take parts of the menu. Most husbands and children love doing dessert! By the way, when delegating you must let go of having things your way. You may have Crème Brule in mind and end up with Rice Krispie Treats!
2. Choose to be kind – to yourself. The holiday season is all about giving so don’t forget to give to yourself! As mothers, we have a natural tendency to take care of everyone else’s needs before our own. As a result you’re depleted, exhausted and often downright cranky!
There are many ways to be kind to yourself, but for many it all starts with the little voice in your head that nags at you just about every day. It’s the voice of negativity, of not enough, of inadequacy and of unmet needs that tells you that you “should” be doing things differently if you were a better mother, wife, friend, etc.
The voice, which is already overpowering, becomes even stronger during the holiday season when you’re rushing to do everything on or before December 25th! So choose to speak loving, kind words to yourself and about yourself.
3. Choose to breathe. Many moms complain that they’re so busy that they don’t have time to breathe! Well, the good news is that you can choose to breathe and it only takes a few minutes.
The bottom line is, stress feels bad because the tension your body experiences is cutting off oxygen it needs to function well. So whenever you’re filled with the overwhelming demands of the holidays, close your eyes, take a few deep inhalations and exhalations, and then remind yourself that this season is about love, joy and happy memories.
This is a technique I use so frequently that my children have adopted it to calm themselves down too. In the midst of a tantrum, I ask them to stop and sit on my lap; we close our eyes, press our foreheads together and practice a few deep breaths. Within moments we are able to have a balanced conversation about what started the tantrum and move forward.
About the Author
Occupation: Organizational & Work/Life Effectiveness Consultan
Michele Dortch is the founder of The Integrated Mother and the creator of the only "mom club" to provide a flexible and
effective mentoring program for success-oriented working moms. Learn more at http://www.integratedmother.com.
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Tags: choices, unmet needs, negativity, holiday season, natural tendency, dessert, fine art, delegation, family member, mother in law, little voice, inadequacy, family holiday, gift shopping, holiday meal, holiday stress, frantic pace